Considerable Pain

by Jesse Colton

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1.
2.
Home 03:01
3.
Michael 08:00
In the morning we skated in the parking lot We soaped up our shoes and went sliding on rails Making our movies and making up stories I'm cleaning your room and I'm biting your nails Reading your books and watching your movies We would eat cookie dough right from the can Running my fingers across the hair on your legs We are falling asleep touching hands Your dad, my mother We'll be a family and you'll be my brother You do not love me the way that I love you But I am your friend and you are my lover You left your watch behind the day that we met I kept it under my pillow for weeks I wrote your name down and said it out loud And tasted the sound on my lips and my teeth It was my birthday, we were riding in the backseat You gave me your knee and I rested my head I was so excited to see you again That I left the door open and ran to your bed That first night I was sleepless Laying my head on your chest You were so peaceful and I was lonely Holding your hand while you slept Your sister, my brother We'll be a family and love one another You do not love me the way that I love you But I am your friend and you are my lover Here we are, there are jets and they're warm Here we are taking a shower together Here we are finding your dad's hidden porn Here we are touching ourselves together Here we are fighting, you pushed me onto the bed Here we are shouting again Here I am crying with you at the door and it's locked Here I am losing my friend I changed my name at school People believe you're my brother You do not love me the way that I love you But I am your friend and you are my friend and Still I remember the days that we spent in our world I remember when I was alive Walking the sidewalks with you I am happy And I've not been happy since 2005 No one can break us, the boys that we were The way that your skin smells all over my face The way you were crying and wrapped in a towel The way that you trusted me when we embraced I got you suspended but I was just mad You shouldn't love her, I've been here all this time You called me and asked "What of us now?" I don't know, but I would still love you if you were not mine My friend, my brother We'll be a family and have each other You did not love me but I'll always love you I was your friend and you were my lover My friend, my brother We'll be a family and love one another You do not love me the way that I love you But I am your friend and you are my lover
4.
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6.
In the Wake 02:02
7.
I Don't Care 03:05
8.
Wasting Time 02:11
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To Be Alone 01:39
13.
Almost 03:00
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released February 11, 2020

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